It has been busy both where I work and where I live. Lots of stuff to do; lots more to think about.
For the first time in many years I took two whole weeks off, and haven't been called in or managed to get worried about anything that caused me to drive in. I have not even logged in remotely. Things must be running well, or there's something I am not understanding.
I have a good bit to do before the new year starts, and not all that much time in which to do it. I also have a personal task - the yearly Christmas letter that has not gone out for several years, and a puff piece for the blog about mended families, my kids and grandkids, and other things that are somewhat personal. There are also plenty of emails owed, at least some of which debt will be covered before I go back to work, I hope.
In less than 60 days I will be 72. I'm not so sure I want to be 72, but the only way I can see to avoid getting that old is not to live that long - and I am not done living!
This Christmas is the first in many years wherein we have had complete families. It's a really big deal - one grandson spent the first 13 years of his life without his father - this year, just weeks back, his father has been returned to him and to his mother, yielding a complete family. There's a lot of history that doesn't bear opening up right now, but at this end of that long period, it seems to be all good - and I'm glad that Ronnie, Jr. has Ronnie Sr. back in his life on a daily basis. My daughter is better, Junior is better, and Senior is the stuff of miracles. Synergy is happening- the whole is greater than the sum of the parts, and the whole is good for the entirety of Rudolph in this area.
Other daughter is doing well, and their two children are marvels and growing - soon they will be schoolchildren, and we are not ready for that! Within the next three years, both will become students. Their teachers are in for some really interesting times!
The coming year will be interesting for Phyllis and myself, too. It seems that we are undergoing restructuring at work, and the duties of all of us will change. This may lead to retirement for me, or it may lead to incentive to stay even longer than I plan at present. What happens with me will have effects on Phyllis's plan; we just don't yet know what they will be.
Over the years, I have met many people who had a significant effect on me and on directions I have taken - some to my benefit immediately, some where the benefit could be seen only with years of hindsight. My father, when he was alive told me that there was no learning without lumps. Much as I hate to admit it, he was right - I have accumulated my share (and probably yours) of lumps over the years, and each one was a lesson - some of which came with considerable pain - some physical, some not. Every time I dropped a motorcycle, there was enough real pain involved I resolved never again to do that particular thing. Sure enough, over the years I dropped them less frequently, and sometimes wouldn't drop one for years - until I forgot how much it could hurt, then I got reminded.... I guess you'd have to be a motorcyclist to understand why I still ride them....
I have to get busy and Do Some Things. I'm not done with the Year End Maunderings yet - there will be more, but for right now I have a few other things get accomplished. I'll be back!
Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts
Monday, December 30, 2013
Friday, October 18, 2013
Second chances, redux
Well, last night a bunch of us got together for dinner, to meet again with my daughter's new husband, whom we have not seen for many years, and to watch his son be surprised because his dad joined us at dinner and he was not expected home much before Christmas.
Both daughters were there with their kids. This can be pretty exciting because the youngest's two (almost four and more than 5) are bright, vocal, active kids, and tend to end up being the stellar attraction, however, last night they seemed to sense that not only was this a Big Deal, but it was a Big Deal for their older cousin and made sure to greet the new Uncle as family and not as some interloper who just showed up out of nowhere.
My wife and I had concerns about the evening - we have not seen the new son-in-law for more than just a couple of years and, understanding some things that had been said and some that had been thought over the years, the potential was there for a heated emotional disaster - but it did not even stick its head in the room - we met a gentleman, an intrinsically good man who had spent much of his life in places that weren't really that good either for him or anyone else. He has used his time away well, taking coursework and other opportunities to better his understanding of why some things are as they are and how to handle those things and turn them to his advantage. It was a great evening for all of us, and we look forward to more of them.
My daughter is of course over the moon, and her son likewise - they can look at him, talk to him, and not worry what machinations of fate are going to get him moved, segregated or otherwise barred from being around those who love him. It's a win for all of us.
I know he had his concerns - he knows all too well that there have been times he was not one of my favorite people - but he's not the man I didn't like, not any more - he has turned into a guy that I can respect, someone who has shown that he can handle adversity and learn from it, that past behaviors do not rule forever, and that he is capable of growing, learning, and becoming a greater person.
I am feeling pretty positive now - I think this is a positive thing for all of us, not just for the daughter and her son - and that there will finally be healing for all of us.
It is a shame that his mother did not live to see this day.
But the rest of us did live to see it - and it looks better than any of us had a right to anticipate. I'm suddenly sleeping really well.
On another topic - my surgeon tells me I can't have coffee. Growlgrumbleandbitch! I asked him why, and he told me that the ulcer that did not perforate was the worst one he has ever seen, and he's seen a few. Until I get scoped again, no coffee, and maybe not then. I wish I wan't asymptomatic regarding the ulcers themselves - seems to me anything that ugly ought to cause me pain, and they don't, not just being there - and at my age, I don't guess it will change a whole lot, so I have to pay attention and do what he wants, just so I don't get to see him again late one night....
Orthopod visit Monday morning, new glasses Tuesday - everything is moving along. My knees are lousy, but they've been lousy for a while and as long as I ignore them it is bearable. Getting up off the floor, however, is a real exercise in funny-looking. I am stillnot as strong as I want to be, but the Guzzi is at least keeping me grinning riding it.
Well, I gotta call my wife and see what she wants to do about dinner,then go into the garage, start the Guzzi and head for home, grinning all the way...
Y'all be well, y'hear?
Both daughters were there with their kids. This can be pretty exciting because the youngest's two (almost four and more than 5) are bright, vocal, active kids, and tend to end up being the stellar attraction, however, last night they seemed to sense that not only was this a Big Deal, but it was a Big Deal for their older cousin and made sure to greet the new Uncle as family and not as some interloper who just showed up out of nowhere.
My wife and I had concerns about the evening - we have not seen the new son-in-law for more than just a couple of years and, understanding some things that had been said and some that had been thought over the years, the potential was there for a heated emotional disaster - but it did not even stick its head in the room - we met a gentleman, an intrinsically good man who had spent much of his life in places that weren't really that good either for him or anyone else. He has used his time away well, taking coursework and other opportunities to better his understanding of why some things are as they are and how to handle those things and turn them to his advantage. It was a great evening for all of us, and we look forward to more of them.
My daughter is of course over the moon, and her son likewise - they can look at him, talk to him, and not worry what machinations of fate are going to get him moved, segregated or otherwise barred from being around those who love him. It's a win for all of us.
I know he had his concerns - he knows all too well that there have been times he was not one of my favorite people - but he's not the man I didn't like, not any more - he has turned into a guy that I can respect, someone who has shown that he can handle adversity and learn from it, that past behaviors do not rule forever, and that he is capable of growing, learning, and becoming a greater person.
I am feeling pretty positive now - I think this is a positive thing for all of us, not just for the daughter and her son - and that there will finally be healing for all of us.
It is a shame that his mother did not live to see this day.
But the rest of us did live to see it - and it looks better than any of us had a right to anticipate. I'm suddenly sleeping really well.
On another topic - my surgeon tells me I can't have coffee. Growlgrumbleandbitch! I asked him why, and he told me that the ulcer that did not perforate was the worst one he has ever seen, and he's seen a few. Until I get scoped again, no coffee, and maybe not then. I wish I wan't asymptomatic regarding the ulcers themselves - seems to me anything that ugly ought to cause me pain, and they don't, not just being there - and at my age, I don't guess it will change a whole lot, so I have to pay attention and do what he wants, just so I don't get to see him again late one night....
Orthopod visit Monday morning, new glasses Tuesday - everything is moving along. My knees are lousy, but they've been lousy for a while and as long as I ignore them it is bearable. Getting up off the floor, however, is a real exercise in funny-looking. I am stillnot as strong as I want to be, but the Guzzi is at least keeping me grinning riding it.
Well, I gotta call my wife and see what she wants to do about dinner,then go into the garage, start the Guzzi and head for home, grinning all the way...
Y'all be well, y'hear?
Thursday, October 17, 2013
Second Chances
One of my grandkids has a father whom he sees very seldom.
That will all change today - his father is getting out and returning to his loved ones.
Many of you know me to be a hardass about convicted felons, crime, and such things in general.
Well, from working around cops, I know Correctional Facilities take what appear to be Bad People off the street. Some do their time, reoffend and make their way back. For some, they've spent so much time incarcerated that it's the only life they feel to be safe - the rules are known, inflexible, and iron hard. Outside, among real people, the rules are sometimes harder to discern.
Once in a while, however, someone comes out having learned something - possibly the consequences of particular behaviors, possibly what happened that creates the inappropriate behavior, sometimes just with the resolve never to return.
For a change, I am not cynical about this - I truly believe that this person is the exception. I might be naive, but I have to give him the shot, and support his efforts. We are about the only family he has, and I honestly think there's not a malign bone in him - although life has crapped in his cheerios times without number.
Now, I really tried to hate this guy - some pretty difficult times with one of my kids were times over which he had influence - but I couldn't hate him - many times I saw a good person there, sorely misguided, a victim of his own shortightedness, poor choices, and poor familial examples.
I know the rate of recidivism is large - but this will be the time the prediction is proven false.
I guess underneath, I'm a big softheaded dope - but that's what I believe, and I am convinced that this guy won't let me down, that he'll be a good father to his child, and a fit husband for my daughter.
And for right now, that's all I have to say on the matter - except you might pray for all of us, that we make the best we can out of what we've been handed.
Thanks.
That will all change today - his father is getting out and returning to his loved ones.
Many of you know me to be a hardass about convicted felons, crime, and such things in general.
Well, from working around cops, I know Correctional Facilities take what appear to be Bad People off the street. Some do their time, reoffend and make their way back. For some, they've spent so much time incarcerated that it's the only life they feel to be safe - the rules are known, inflexible, and iron hard. Outside, among real people, the rules are sometimes harder to discern.
Once in a while, however, someone comes out having learned something - possibly the consequences of particular behaviors, possibly what happened that creates the inappropriate behavior, sometimes just with the resolve never to return.
For a change, I am not cynical about this - I truly believe that this person is the exception. I might be naive, but I have to give him the shot, and support his efforts. We are about the only family he has, and I honestly think there's not a malign bone in him - although life has crapped in his cheerios times without number.
Now, I really tried to hate this guy - some pretty difficult times with one of my kids were times over which he had influence - but I couldn't hate him - many times I saw a good person there, sorely misguided, a victim of his own shortightedness, poor choices, and poor familial examples.
I know the rate of recidivism is large - but this will be the time the prediction is proven false.
I guess underneath, I'm a big softheaded dope - but that's what I believe, and I am convinced that this guy won't let me down, that he'll be a good father to his child, and a fit husband for my daughter.
And for right now, that's all I have to say on the matter - except you might pray for all of us, that we make the best we can out of what we've been handed.
Thanks.
Sunday, October 13, 2013
Sunday. Friday the 13th came on Sunday this month.
If the title is confusing, it comes from an old Pogo comic strip.
If you don't know about Pogo, well, I can't help all that much - you are probably too young to understand the humor that Pogo and his pals were wont to use.
It is Sunday, and when I got up it was raining. I guess it doesn't matter that the new battery for the Guzzi has not yet arrived - I wouldn't ride in the rain anyhow. So it was off to church in the old Volvo to be a choirboy again this morning. I've been doing this so long that it feels very strange to sit in the congregation - I don't know how to behave with only hymns to sing.
Right now I am at work - I volunteered in a moment of insanity) to cover a shift today and tomorrow for which there was no coverage. I got here a bit early to pick Margaret's brain(since I haven't run this shift in a couple of years, and Margaret is the source of all knowledge about any shift that I haven't had to work for a while.
I don't expect all that much activity this afternoon - for one thing, there's a Ravens game that will keep most folks either glued to their TeeVee or suffering in the weather, shouting their voices bloody at the stadium. This evening some stuff might happen, but it isn't here yet, so I can just sit and wait, and blather on about things that matter to me (and probably nobody else in the known universe.)
Next week is just full of things to do - Monday has a dentist visit and a 3-11 shift, like today. Wednesday has a visit to the surgeon that patched the hole in my gut a little while back. I expect he'll want me to go and have an upper endoscopy, which will shoot one whole day for me whenever I have to have it done, but I am interested in knowing what there is to see down there, and if it looks better, worse, or the same as it did the night I had surgery. I'll also be interested to know if there are to be any medication or dietary changes.
Brought a couple of toys with me today - my tablet, my phone and one of my laptops, a headset and a little gadget I picked up a while back. We don't have WiFi most places where I work, so I have a little access point - about the size of a jump drive that will plug into an ethernet cable and make a local wireless zone. I got it when I found that many motels are now wired and don't run wireless into rooms - and if they are wired, they have only one cable connection and with more than one device that is networkable (particularly when phone and tablet do not have ethernet connections, only wireless) this makes my life a whole lot easier.
This is what it looks like, if you are curious:
Tiny Access Point / Router / Wireless adapter
I got mine from eBay, but they are available all over the place, and at all kinds of different prices.
I just looked over at Facebook, and see some bleeding-heart libs are attacking the Conservatives again - calling them names, telling them their sources are crap - but they don't seem to be able to supply any real refutation of the conservative points - or else their minds are not so oriented that they think that real information is required. They seem to be from the school that says "shout louder and insult and you'll be believed, or they'll get pissed and go away - which leaves yours as the only voice." I don't feel line engaging this afternoon - I'd rather just be here in this space and read, or write, or drink coffee and/or answer the phone and think my thoughts. No rants today - I just don't feel like expending the energy only to cast pearls before swine....
Hmm. That wasn't nice. Pretend I didn't say it.
I just learned that the Blue Man Group is to be in Las Vegas during the time I am there. I wonder if I can arrange to see them? Tickets aren't cheap, but it might be worth the time to go. I have this feeling that I'll not have much time for fun at all over that weekend - too much to do in a strange town - and I am told that there is nowhere to walk that takes less than half an hour.... With my knees and one leg the way they are, it doesn't sound like a real fun time - but we shall see. If I can find a couple of other folks that wanna go, it's on!
Last time I was in Las Vegas was a little over 40 years ago, and I imagine that nothing will be where or as it was then - not that I'd remember all that much as I was only there for the day. Jamie had been born, and our Uncle Jum was taking some of us to Las Vegas for breakfast. He is a physician and has had his own airplane for many years, so we were flying in. Lovely trip, and I actually got to fly a Mooney and didn't even scare him (as far as I know.) But we left before midafternoon, because the air over the mountains that we have to cross to get back to San Bernardino gets pretty rough in the heat of the day, and the Mooney is just too small to accommodate airsick travelers. It was an interesting trip, and the damnedest breakfast buffet I have ever seen - easily ten times the size of the largest I had ever seen before. Bad place for a fat guy...
This time I won't have time to gamble - too much other stuff to do. Last time I think I won about $20 in dimes from slots (remember, this was 40 years ago - and $20 was a bunch of money to lots of people....)
Only 6 hours to go in this shift. I may have to go upstairs to my office and borrow some music or something to keep me buzzing around - nobody even to chat with and I'm not a really great person to leave alone somewhere. Maybe I can find some speakers - I already have a thumb drive with some music, or I'll go to the Big Server at home and pull some down. I also have Netflix- maybe I'll watch a movie.
Well I just had to do a little work. Makes the time go faster, it does. I also had to admit to an end-user that I could not help him because I didn't know how. Oh well....
Just discovered that Google Chrome has a bunch of apps or builtins - gotta try a few to see how this TeeVee stuff works in here. We supposedly have a pretty fat Internet pipe - I think I'm gonna go see what I can find.
This window has been open too long - y'all have a fun evening. I'll stop in again if I find anything really exciting - or if the urge to start a rant overwhelms me.
If you don't know about Pogo, well, I can't help all that much - you are probably too young to understand the humor that Pogo and his pals were wont to use.
It is Sunday, and when I got up it was raining. I guess it doesn't matter that the new battery for the Guzzi has not yet arrived - I wouldn't ride in the rain anyhow. So it was off to church in the old Volvo to be a choirboy again this morning. I've been doing this so long that it feels very strange to sit in the congregation - I don't know how to behave with only hymns to sing.
Right now I am at work - I volunteered in a moment of insanity) to cover a shift today and tomorrow for which there was no coverage. I got here a bit early to pick Margaret's brain(since I haven't run this shift in a couple of years, and Margaret is the source of all knowledge about any shift that I haven't had to work for a while.
I don't expect all that much activity this afternoon - for one thing, there's a Ravens game that will keep most folks either glued to their TeeVee or suffering in the weather, shouting their voices bloody at the stadium. This evening some stuff might happen, but it isn't here yet, so I can just sit and wait, and blather on about things that matter to me (and probably nobody else in the known universe.)
Next week is just full of things to do - Monday has a dentist visit and a 3-11 shift, like today. Wednesday has a visit to the surgeon that patched the hole in my gut a little while back. I expect he'll want me to go and have an upper endoscopy, which will shoot one whole day for me whenever I have to have it done, but I am interested in knowing what there is to see down there, and if it looks better, worse, or the same as it did the night I had surgery. I'll also be interested to know if there are to be any medication or dietary changes.
Brought a couple of toys with me today - my tablet, my phone and one of my laptops, a headset and a little gadget I picked up a while back. We don't have WiFi most places where I work, so I have a little access point - about the size of a jump drive that will plug into an ethernet cable and make a local wireless zone. I got it when I found that many motels are now wired and don't run wireless into rooms - and if they are wired, they have only one cable connection and with more than one device that is networkable (particularly when phone and tablet do not have ethernet connections, only wireless) this makes my life a whole lot easier.
This is what it looks like, if you are curious:
Tiny Access Point / Router / Wireless adapter
I got mine from eBay, but they are available all over the place, and at all kinds of different prices.
I just looked over at Facebook, and see some bleeding-heart libs are attacking the Conservatives again - calling them names, telling them their sources are crap - but they don't seem to be able to supply any real refutation of the conservative points - or else their minds are not so oriented that they think that real information is required. They seem to be from the school that says "shout louder and insult and you'll be believed, or they'll get pissed and go away - which leaves yours as the only voice." I don't feel line engaging this afternoon - I'd rather just be here in this space and read, or write, or drink coffee and/or answer the phone and think my thoughts. No rants today - I just don't feel like expending the energy only to cast pearls before swine....
Hmm. That wasn't nice. Pretend I didn't say it.
I just learned that the Blue Man Group is to be in Las Vegas during the time I am there. I wonder if I can arrange to see them? Tickets aren't cheap, but it might be worth the time to go. I have this feeling that I'll not have much time for fun at all over that weekend - too much to do in a strange town - and I am told that there is nowhere to walk that takes less than half an hour.... With my knees and one leg the way they are, it doesn't sound like a real fun time - but we shall see. If I can find a couple of other folks that wanna go, it's on!
Last time I was in Las Vegas was a little over 40 years ago, and I imagine that nothing will be where or as it was then - not that I'd remember all that much as I was only there for the day. Jamie had been born, and our Uncle Jum was taking some of us to Las Vegas for breakfast. He is a physician and has had his own airplane for many years, so we were flying in. Lovely trip, and I actually got to fly a Mooney and didn't even scare him (as far as I know.) But we left before midafternoon, because the air over the mountains that we have to cross to get back to San Bernardino gets pretty rough in the heat of the day, and the Mooney is just too small to accommodate airsick travelers. It was an interesting trip, and the damnedest breakfast buffet I have ever seen - easily ten times the size of the largest I had ever seen before. Bad place for a fat guy...
This time I won't have time to gamble - too much other stuff to do. Last time I think I won about $20 in dimes from slots (remember, this was 40 years ago - and $20 was a bunch of money to lots of people....)
Only 6 hours to go in this shift. I may have to go upstairs to my office and borrow some music or something to keep me buzzing around - nobody even to chat with and I'm not a really great person to leave alone somewhere. Maybe I can find some speakers - I already have a thumb drive with some music, or I'll go to the Big Server at home and pull some down. I also have Netflix- maybe I'll watch a movie.
Well I just had to do a little work. Makes the time go faster, it does. I also had to admit to an end-user that I could not help him because I didn't know how. Oh well....
Just discovered that Google Chrome has a bunch of apps or builtins - gotta try a few to see how this TeeVee stuff works in here. We supposedly have a pretty fat Internet pipe - I think I'm gonna go see what I can find.
This window has been open too long - y'all have a fun evening. I'll stop in again if I find anything really exciting - or if the urge to start a rant overwhelms me.
Friday, October 11, 2013
TGIF Day!
Well, Friday has arrived, and started off with a visit to my physician. He's a good guy, and we have known him for probably 30 years or so. His MA took my blood pressure and found it elevated. He took it and found it low (for me) - so we both reassured the MA that she's still got 'it.' I hope he doesn't have to explain it later today - she's a newbie and might not know about old standing jokes. She managed to give me a B12 shot without giving me any pain, and we set up an appointment to come back in 6 weeks. He also reminded me that I need to get an upper endoscopy to see if I still have ulcers or something. You all have to know how much I look forward to endoscopies.....
So I was a little late. Rain was all over today, and we have a couple of small lakes in the back yard. The motorcycles got wet (only a little) and getting the newspaper this morning was an adventure, running (actually walking slowly) between raindrops was the order of the day. I got a little wet, but dried off before leaving to go to the doctor, where I got wet, and dried off before getting to work. I parked inside today, so I didn't get wet any more. Fridays around here are pretty quiet, particularly before a 3-day weekend.
I finished up (again) the project for that outside consultant, logging on late last night to ship him the latest data - all 1.02 gigabytes of it (actually compressed down to 113,996 kb using WinRAR, a really useful tool) via my Google drive - which reminds me I need to clean that one up!
Something messed with my Chrome apps - I need to rebuild that. Happily I remember what I use, mostly. I have been amazed at how useful a lot of the apps and extensions for Google's Chrome have become - there are some I have come to depend on, and I hadn't given much credence to Google's approach. Looks to me as if they got a lot right!
I fear there won't be much done today that is mission-oriented - too many other things that can be cleaned up. Next week I have to start cleaning up to Clarion apps that I still have active, killing off the ones that aren't used, and upgrading at least to Version 8 anything that isn't already there. I have Version 9 installed, but haven't had a chance to mess with it much. I also need to purge off a bunch of unused .bat files, SQL scripts and FTP scripts - there is so much that was put out there and has fallen into disuse that if I don't do this soon I'll be breaking more stuff than I fix.... I need to get all this stuff into a book somehow, and some of it needs major cleanup and simplification. Always time to screw with it, never time to get it right - story of my life....
On another topic, has anyone that reads this ever heard of Heather Rigdon? I ask because some nice person at the office gave me some of her MP3s and I am enjoying them a whole lot. I also discovered that the Beth Nielsen Chapman collection I thought I had lost just got hidden on a damaged drive on the big server, and I was able to recover all of it, which made me pretty happy. Now I have to transfer some of it over here, for use on the days I can make noise and not get bitched at by folks with tin ears.
In going through some old jump drives I have found some music that I had thought was lost - including a bit by Steve Miller at the end of a live concert that merged All Blues with C. C. Rider and some original lyrics to create a long track that was really great, very jazzy and funny, too. If anyone wants anything that I might have, leave a comment and I'll see what I can do for you.
Having discovered that by BluRay player is internet-smart, and that there are all kinds of movies available, I am thinking of killing off most of my movie collections and reclaiming some server space so maybe I won't have to buy drives so damned often to keep everything happy. I am continually amazed at what can be found on YouTube as well as some of the other services just kicking the BuRay box around a bit. I had built a whole media player desktop, and find I don't use it at all - I can do everything media-wise I ever want to do just using the BluRay player. Now I have to get it away from where it is and take it somewhere where it will be useful - like down into the family room, maybe....
My watch must be busted - it sure is taking a long time to get this day over. I'll be in Sunday and Monday (both scheduled days off) to cover a 3-11 shift that would otherwise be uncovered, because I am such a Nice Person - and because it will supply the comp time I need to take that weekend in Las Vegas in a week or two and not use any precious annual leave.
I'm trying hard to stay away from politics because some of what is going on makes me angry (and profane) and I don't want any nastiness to leak into this - so I'll save it for a time I want to show just how damn nasty I am capable of being when profoundly irritated. But not today - I don't have the energy.
What I really need is a day that is about 32 hours long - then I could get lots done and still sleep for 9 or so hours. As it is, I get to bed usually between 1 and 2 (my physician says older adults need bedtimes, too - but nobody can stay up around our house long enough to see that I observe any established bedtime.) and wake up at 7:45 when my phone says it is time to get up, make coffee, and do Other Things to get ready for the day. What I should do is get up an hour earlier and walk around the block a time or two. No point taking any bets on when this will start, as I don't think it will any time soon.
I really hate this time of year, when I come home in the darn - it removes from me any desire to do anything after I eat something - anything, that is, besides park my arse in the chair read and/or watch the TeeVee. I don't lose a whole lot of weight that way....
While I was off doing some real work a moment ago, my mind wandered into the place where the various ladies I have known over the last 70+ years have been stored, and I remembered a funny thing or two about a couple of them. Then I seemed to wake up and realized where I was - and decided it wasn't time to visit those spaces. Usually I visit them late at night when nobody is around to watch my face. Maybe one day I'll talk about them, too. But not today.
I've been reading Augusten Burroughs, a brother to John Elder Robison, whose stuff I have also been reading. Robison has Aspergers (which has, if I recall aright, been rendered no-longer-a word by the folks who decide such things) and is a most interesting person to read and to hear. I'm not going to say more - if you are curious, read something from either or both - if you are Kindle-smart I might even loan you some of mine if there is a legal way to do that (and I think that there is.)
Any more, I do a log of my reading with my tablet using a Kindle app, or on one of my Windows machines using a Kindle app for Chrome, the browser. Kindle is set up such that it remembers where you are when you bot a 'book' down. Turn off the computer you were using, go home (or elsewhere) and get out your laptop (or tablet or Android phone) and fire up the Kindle app, and when it opens,m there is the page you were reading when you put it down. Most thoughtful - and you can carry a hell of a big library with you, since e-books don't take up much room, and the Chrome app does everything from the Cloud (whateverthehell that means...) If you hadn't noticed, I'm much impressed by Kindle - particularly by the fact that you don't have to buy one - anything you own can be a Kindle if you need it to be.
I think I've had enough fun, so I'm going to close up shop and go home and see where my lovely wife wants to go for dinner this evening. Be well, y'all.
So I was a little late. Rain was all over today, and we have a couple of small lakes in the back yard. The motorcycles got wet (only a little) and getting the newspaper this morning was an adventure, running (actually walking slowly) between raindrops was the order of the day. I got a little wet, but dried off before leaving to go to the doctor, where I got wet, and dried off before getting to work. I parked inside today, so I didn't get wet any more. Fridays around here are pretty quiet, particularly before a 3-day weekend.
I finished up (again) the project for that outside consultant, logging on late last night to ship him the latest data - all 1.02 gigabytes of it (actually compressed down to 113,996 kb using WinRAR, a really useful tool) via my Google drive - which reminds me I need to clean that one up!
Something messed with my Chrome apps - I need to rebuild that. Happily I remember what I use, mostly. I have been amazed at how useful a lot of the apps and extensions for Google's Chrome have become - there are some I have come to depend on, and I hadn't given much credence to Google's approach. Looks to me as if they got a lot right!
I fear there won't be much done today that is mission-oriented - too many other things that can be cleaned up. Next week I have to start cleaning up to Clarion apps that I still have active, killing off the ones that aren't used, and upgrading at least to Version 8 anything that isn't already there. I have Version 9 installed, but haven't had a chance to mess with it much. I also need to purge off a bunch of unused .bat files, SQL scripts and FTP scripts - there is so much that was put out there and has fallen into disuse that if I don't do this soon I'll be breaking more stuff than I fix.... I need to get all this stuff into a book somehow, and some of it needs major cleanup and simplification. Always time to screw with it, never time to get it right - story of my life....
On another topic, has anyone that reads this ever heard of Heather Rigdon? I ask because some nice person at the office gave me some of her MP3s and I am enjoying them a whole lot. I also discovered that the Beth Nielsen Chapman collection I thought I had lost just got hidden on a damaged drive on the big server, and I was able to recover all of it, which made me pretty happy. Now I have to transfer some of it over here, for use on the days I can make noise and not get bitched at by folks with tin ears.
In going through some old jump drives I have found some music that I had thought was lost - including a bit by Steve Miller at the end of a live concert that merged All Blues with C. C. Rider and some original lyrics to create a long track that was really great, very jazzy and funny, too. If anyone wants anything that I might have, leave a comment and I'll see what I can do for you.
Having discovered that by BluRay player is internet-smart, and that there are all kinds of movies available, I am thinking of killing off most of my movie collections and reclaiming some server space so maybe I won't have to buy drives so damned often to keep everything happy. I am continually amazed at what can be found on YouTube as well as some of the other services just kicking the BuRay box around a bit. I had built a whole media player desktop, and find I don't use it at all - I can do everything media-wise I ever want to do just using the BluRay player. Now I have to get it away from where it is and take it somewhere where it will be useful - like down into the family room, maybe....
My watch must be busted - it sure is taking a long time to get this day over. I'll be in Sunday and Monday (both scheduled days off) to cover a 3-11 shift that would otherwise be uncovered, because I am such a Nice Person - and because it will supply the comp time I need to take that weekend in Las Vegas in a week or two and not use any precious annual leave.
I'm trying hard to stay away from politics because some of what is going on makes me angry (and profane) and I don't want any nastiness to leak into this - so I'll save it for a time I want to show just how damn nasty I am capable of being when profoundly irritated. But not today - I don't have the energy.
What I really need is a day that is about 32 hours long - then I could get lots done and still sleep for 9 or so hours. As it is, I get to bed usually between 1 and 2 (my physician says older adults need bedtimes, too - but nobody can stay up around our house long enough to see that I observe any established bedtime.) and wake up at 7:45 when my phone says it is time to get up, make coffee, and do Other Things to get ready for the day. What I should do is get up an hour earlier and walk around the block a time or two. No point taking any bets on when this will start, as I don't think it will any time soon.
I really hate this time of year, when I come home in the darn - it removes from me any desire to do anything after I eat something - anything, that is, besides park my arse in the chair read and/or watch the TeeVee. I don't lose a whole lot of weight that way....
While I was off doing some real work a moment ago, my mind wandered into the place where the various ladies I have known over the last 70+ years have been stored, and I remembered a funny thing or two about a couple of them. Then I seemed to wake up and realized where I was - and decided it wasn't time to visit those spaces. Usually I visit them late at night when nobody is around to watch my face. Maybe one day I'll talk about them, too. But not today.
I've been reading Augusten Burroughs, a brother to John Elder Robison, whose stuff I have also been reading. Robison has Aspergers (which has, if I recall aright, been rendered no-longer-a word by the folks who decide such things) and is a most interesting person to read and to hear. I'm not going to say more - if you are curious, read something from either or both - if you are Kindle-smart I might even loan you some of mine if there is a legal way to do that (and I think that there is.)
Any more, I do a log of my reading with my tablet using a Kindle app, or on one of my Windows machines using a Kindle app for Chrome, the browser. Kindle is set up such that it remembers where you are when you bot a 'book' down. Turn off the computer you were using, go home (or elsewhere) and get out your laptop (or tablet or Android phone) and fire up the Kindle app, and when it opens,m there is the page you were reading when you put it down. Most thoughtful - and you can carry a hell of a big library with you, since e-books don't take up much room, and the Chrome app does everything from the Cloud (whateverthehell that means...) If you hadn't noticed, I'm much impressed by Kindle - particularly by the fact that you don't have to buy one - anything you own can be a Kindle if you need it to be.
I think I've had enough fun, so I'm going to close up shop and go home and see where my lovely wife wants to go for dinner this evening. Be well, y'all.
Thursday, October 10, 2013
It is now Thursday. Imagine that.
Got up this morning not quite so stiff - apparently I am slowly recovering the ability to get over things quickly. If that sounds contradictory, it may be.
Late last night, before going to bed I started a process to get some results this morning for a consultant on a project for my top boss, the Police Commissioner. The consultant and I have worked for some time with this data, and I have so far managed to get him almost anything he might ask for - but it hasn't alwways been easy.
When I left the office last night, a database was building that would have the latest subset data for the project. I had thought the one I did the day before would be the last, but I figured out how to get a little more info that will shortcut a lot of effort on the consultant's part, so I asked him if he wanted it, and he did - hence the rebuild of the primary database.
Well, last night I logged in remotely to start a process that would strip the data down to manageable size files for him, secure in the knowledge that it would run about 6 hours and when I arrived everything would be ready to send to him. Well, that is how it should have happened. hat actually happened was that part way through the run, Microsoft decided my desktop needed patched, so it downloaded the patches, applied them and booted to box, leaving my process partway finished. I fear I said a bunch of things better not said in polite society (not that cops are all that polite) and immediately restarted the process. With luck it will finish before noon and I can get the info out to the man who needs it. I truly wish Micro$oft would let me d3ecide how to do some things....
It is raining, so having the Guzzi down doesn't really distress me. I have to get a battery ordered today so it will maybe arrive by Saturday so I can have the bike ready for work on Monday. I had planned a ride with the club on Saturday that would have taken a lot of the day - but the weather folks assure me it will rain all day - and I am no longer excited by riding in the rain.
I have to think of a name for the Guzzi - anyone have any thoughts? The Suzuki is called "Big Suzi' because it is so big - what should I call the Moto Guzzi? It is definitely Italian and definitely female and if I knew the name of the girl in the Fiat commercial who is so delicious I would name the bike after her, but I don't know her name. Somehow "Phyllis" doesn't seem to match the character, and "Susan" would not feel honored if I used her name as she has never liked motorcycles, particularly when they were mine....
Someone come up with a name - if I use it, I'll give screen credit.
Otherwise, not a whole lot new. I'll be in Las Vegas from 10/25 through 10/28, for the wedding of Sally and Fred (Sally is a first cousin once removed - there are lots of cousins on my mother's side of the family as she was one of six, one of whch had six, one of which had four - Sal is one of those 4) and to meet with a bunch of other cousins that I don't see as often as I wish because they all moved to the left coast, although when they speak, Pittsburgh is still detectable....
I'm looking forward some to the trip - the last time I was in Las Vegas was in July of 1973, when Jamie was born in California. In addition to my beloved cousins, I look forward to meeting for real someone whom I have 'known' from the world of RosFic for some time, so it should be a fun trip, and I should be busy enough to avoid gambling and/or drinking except for the obligatory glass of champagne at the wedding.
I had hoped to take Phyllis with me on this trip, but it was not to be - church jobs make weekends pretty hard to use for personal things. That morning, our friend Jack will be holding down the tenor section in the choir in my absence, and I do appreciate that.
Meanwhile, the phone is ringing, one of our guys is just back from Ireland, and I have to at least appear to be doing some work, so I'll close this one out. Be well, y'all....
Late last night, before going to bed I started a process to get some results this morning for a consultant on a project for my top boss, the Police Commissioner. The consultant and I have worked for some time with this data, and I have so far managed to get him almost anything he might ask for - but it hasn't alwways been easy.
When I left the office last night, a database was building that would have the latest subset data for the project. I had thought the one I did the day before would be the last, but I figured out how to get a little more info that will shortcut a lot of effort on the consultant's part, so I asked him if he wanted it, and he did - hence the rebuild of the primary database.
Well, last night I logged in remotely to start a process that would strip the data down to manageable size files for him, secure in the knowledge that it would run about 6 hours and when I arrived everything would be ready to send to him. Well, that is how it should have happened. hat actually happened was that part way through the run, Microsoft decided my desktop needed patched, so it downloaded the patches, applied them and booted to box, leaving my process partway finished. I fear I said a bunch of things better not said in polite society (not that cops are all that polite) and immediately restarted the process. With luck it will finish before noon and I can get the info out to the man who needs it. I truly wish Micro$oft would let me d3ecide how to do some things....
It is raining, so having the Guzzi down doesn't really distress me. I have to get a battery ordered today so it will maybe arrive by Saturday so I can have the bike ready for work on Monday. I had planned a ride with the club on Saturday that would have taken a lot of the day - but the weather folks assure me it will rain all day - and I am no longer excited by riding in the rain.
I have to think of a name for the Guzzi - anyone have any thoughts? The Suzuki is called "Big Suzi' because it is so big - what should I call the Moto Guzzi? It is definitely Italian and definitely female and if I knew the name of the girl in the Fiat commercial who is so delicious I would name the bike after her, but I don't know her name. Somehow "Phyllis" doesn't seem to match the character, and "Susan" would not feel honored if I used her name as she has never liked motorcycles, particularly when they were mine....
Someone come up with a name - if I use it, I'll give screen credit.
Otherwise, not a whole lot new. I'll be in Las Vegas from 10/25 through 10/28, for the wedding of Sally and Fred (Sally is a first cousin once removed - there are lots of cousins on my mother's side of the family as she was one of six, one of whch had six, one of which had four - Sal is one of those 4) and to meet with a bunch of other cousins that I don't see as often as I wish because they all moved to the left coast, although when they speak, Pittsburgh is still detectable....
I'm looking forward some to the trip - the last time I was in Las Vegas was in July of 1973, when Jamie was born in California. In addition to my beloved cousins, I look forward to meeting for real someone whom I have 'known' from the world of RosFic for some time, so it should be a fun trip, and I should be busy enough to avoid gambling and/or drinking except for the obligatory glass of champagne at the wedding.
I had hoped to take Phyllis with me on this trip, but it was not to be - church jobs make weekends pretty hard to use for personal things. That morning, our friend Jack will be holding down the tenor section in the choir in my absence, and I do appreciate that.
Meanwhile, the phone is ringing, one of our guys is just back from Ireland, and I have to at least appear to be doing some work, so I'll close this one out. Be well, y'all....
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Back to Work after the first week...
Well, this week I went back to work, most of the day. I am now allowed to drive my car, and even to start my motorcycle provided I don't drop it on myself.
Going back to work was good, felt good, and tired me out at the same time. I forgot how much little things like walking get taken for granted. My parking space is as far away from my office as it can get in our garage, and right now it takes a lot longer to walk that little bit than it used to - and wears me out worse.
Not helped by the fact that they finally fixed our air conditioning, so I finally had to resort to a flannel shirt in order not to shiver and have chattering teeth!
Kinda nice to have my tools & toys the way I expect them to be, instead of working remote with things ass I like them at home but not for work purposes.
I even managed to fi a couple of things this week, one of which had me angry and frustrated when the long hiatus started back in late July.
Damn. I just realized I was out for nearly two months. My email is still a bit behind but is getting caught up. With any luck t all, by the time December comes, I'll be ready for Thanksgiving.
I have ridden the motorcycle a couple of times, and it did feel good. My wife thinks I should go for one a little lighter, which has put me into looking at some of the BMW R-series that I so loved, as well as the Honda Pacific Coast and ST models, and the oddball but marvelous Moto Guzzzi tourers.
I was considering a sidecar on a Gold Wing or maybe a BMW K-model, but they are all coming up a bit too dear. My wife is backing this, but hasn't yet given me an indication of what she will tolerate by way of a price, so for right now i am just looking. I, of course have the New Motorcycle fever, but she tends to be a bit more grounded than I am, so I can be sure it won't happen today or tomorrow. We shall see.
Overall, I am feeling better, but still tire far too easily and find pain when I've been doing too much and, of course, dietary restrictions don't do much for my good nature.
Be well, y'all
PS - I sometimes wonder who reads this - whoever you are out there, you might leave a comment or something.
Going back to work was good, felt good, and tired me out at the same time. I forgot how much little things like walking get taken for granted. My parking space is as far away from my office as it can get in our garage, and right now it takes a lot longer to walk that little bit than it used to - and wears me out worse.
Not helped by the fact that they finally fixed our air conditioning, so I finally had to resort to a flannel shirt in order not to shiver and have chattering teeth!
Kinda nice to have my tools & toys the way I expect them to be, instead of working remote with things ass I like them at home but not for work purposes.
I even managed to fi a couple of things this week, one of which had me angry and frustrated when the long hiatus started back in late July.
Damn. I just realized I was out for nearly two months. My email is still a bit behind but is getting caught up. With any luck t all, by the time December comes, I'll be ready for Thanksgiving.
I have ridden the motorcycle a couple of times, and it did feel good. My wife thinks I should go for one a little lighter, which has put me into looking at some of the BMW R-series that I so loved, as well as the Honda Pacific Coast and ST models, and the oddball but marvelous Moto Guzzzi tourers.
I was considering a sidecar on a Gold Wing or maybe a BMW K-model, but they are all coming up a bit too dear. My wife is backing this, but hasn't yet given me an indication of what she will tolerate by way of a price, so for right now i am just looking. I, of course have the New Motorcycle fever, but she tends to be a bit more grounded than I am, so I can be sure it won't happen today or tomorrow. We shall see.
Overall, I am feeling better, but still tire far too easily and find pain when I've been doing too much and, of course, dietary restrictions don't do much for my good nature.
Be well, y'all
PS - I sometimes wonder who reads this - whoever you are out there, you might leave a comment or something.
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
Back to work!
This is the first day I have been to work since July 24. It seems like a year. During the period of down time I probably worked more at home than I usually do at work, just to stay sane.
This enforced hiatus has taught me more than a couple things:
This enforced hiatus has taught me more than a couple things:
- Daytime TeeVee really sucks - and even with NetFlix and internet onnectivity, there are only so many hours that one can stand to watch without becoming a little crazy.
- Perforating ulcers are no fun, particularly when they, without warning, perforate.
- We have some good hospitals around here - but being home is still better.
- Liquid diets are no fun.
- Pureed diets are even less fun (glass of pizza anyone?)
- Soft food diets can be disgusting.
- Laporoscopic surgery is the best possible way to have things in your belly examined - if they need examined. Better is not to need anything looked at that closely.
Leading up to the hiatus, I was reminded that if a motorcycle is falling over and you are on it, get out of the way! If you don't do that, you could get your leg broken - which is where this all started on July 24th.
It was good to get back to work. I did not get as much done as I might have wished, but I got something done, got what I needed for several other somethings, and was pleased at the end of the day.
Now I can go back tomorrow and be truly productive.
Work is good.
Now I have to find another motorcycle that is a couple hundred pounds lighter than Big Suzi....
Saturday, September 7, 2013
As I said, aging is not for the timid. From my perspective, it is best to avoid it if possible. For most of my life, I've managed not to grow up, and it has helped, but in the last 10 years I've had a couple of hospital visits that were unplanned, unwanted, and more than a bit on the scary side.
As many of you may know, I had a gastric bypass around 9 years ago. The fact that the results of that were not all I had hoped were not a fault of the procedure nor of the surgeon - if anything, the surgeon was so good that many of the short-term negative reinforcement episodes that usually accompany this surgery were not to appear to me, and I got sloppy and didn't follow all the rules - and reaped the reward.
Now, I have never felt myself to be particularly stressed. I know what I do, being on 24 hour call, can produce stress, but I was pretty convinced that I had found my way past all that, and was living a pretty stress-free life, and didn't have to worry about any negative effects the stresses I was ignoring were creating for me.
Well about two years after the bypass I took a motorcycle trip to Hatboro, where I had lived during some pretty important years of my life. I do this on occasion, so it was not particularly unusual for me to take this trip. What was unusual was that I got hit by a pickup truck in a parking lot and was knocked over, motorcycle and all. I knew it hurt, because I had a rather leg caught between the motorcycle and the truck bumper, and I had a scrape or seven in various places. I looked at myself in the bathroom - nothing was broken or bleeding (or if bleeding only a little) and since I was closer to Hatboro, I decided to continue the trip there and hole up in a motel until the next day to see if rest made the pain go away.
The pain did not go away the next day and my left leg had assumed the color of an eggplant, so I decided to make one visit and then head for home instead of staying until Sunday or Monday and wandering around bucks and Montgomery county as I had planned. Riding didn't hurt, but getting off when I got home surely did, and when my lovely wife saw my leg she was not pleased. Eventually I had it seen, nothing was broken, and slowly it healed and assumed its normal coloring. Then I got some sort of respiratory thing, had a chest X-ray and was told to get a CT scan, because the X-ray showed something like maybe an aneurysm.... the day I had the scan, my mother died. Two weeks later, I was hospitalized for a GI bleed that took about 5 bags of blood before it stopped. Endoscopy showed ulcers - but I never knew they were there - no pain, no real discomfort (at least until I had lost so much blood I was falling down trying to walk to my chair) nothing like any warning. The doctors said that I must be under a lost of stress. Years later, reflecting on the happenings of that few weeks, I guess they were right, but at the time I didn't think so.
Then about 6 weeks ago, I dropped the motorcycle on my right leg (usually it is the left that I fall on....) and was in the presence of friends and fellow riders, so getting up was not hard. We had stopped for ice cream, and as I made my way to get some, I noticed that that foot really hurt - but I got my ice cream and rode home accompanied by some friends who would not let me ride alone. I didn't think it was all that bad, it just hurt. A couple of days later I had it X-rayed and found a nondisplaced fracture of the fibula. After 71 years, I broke a bone. I went to see an orthopod, was told I had to stay home and wear a fracture boot. Meanwhile I had a couple of important projects at work, so I arranged to work at home, and within a week I woke up with some pretty awful abdominal pain, ended up in the ER, and had emergency surgery to find the source of the free air in my abdomen, which turned out to be a little bitty ulcer that had perforated, right next to two big ones that had not. The surgeon was a bariatric surgeon, so he was able to do what needed done laporoscopically, which meant a far shorter recovery time than might have been possible. Still, although the surgery was less than the bypass, from which I was sent home with 47 hours of my arrival in the hospital, this one took four days before I was sent home, and I was a whole lot more beat-up feeling. I was older, and less prepared, and it took its toll. Upon reflection, I guess falling, having a broken leg, a new boss and some hot projects was more stress than I was used to, it aggravated the ulcers I didn't know I had, and ended up blowing through the wall of my duodenum.
I am told that the bleed a few years back or this perforation could have ended my life, and that had I not gone directly to the hospital, the damage from the perforation could have kept me there for weeks instead of just a few days. Hard as it may be to believe, until now the phrase 'might have ended my life' has not registered - I thought it was just inconvenient that these things were happening.
If I seem to be a bit low key, you'll know why.
As many of you may know, I had a gastric bypass around 9 years ago. The fact that the results of that were not all I had hoped were not a fault of the procedure nor of the surgeon - if anything, the surgeon was so good that many of the short-term negative reinforcement episodes that usually accompany this surgery were not to appear to me, and I got sloppy and didn't follow all the rules - and reaped the reward.
Now, I have never felt myself to be particularly stressed. I know what I do, being on 24 hour call, can produce stress, but I was pretty convinced that I had found my way past all that, and was living a pretty stress-free life, and didn't have to worry about any negative effects the stresses I was ignoring were creating for me.
Well about two years after the bypass I took a motorcycle trip to Hatboro, where I had lived during some pretty important years of my life. I do this on occasion, so it was not particularly unusual for me to take this trip. What was unusual was that I got hit by a pickup truck in a parking lot and was knocked over, motorcycle and all. I knew it hurt, because I had a rather leg caught between the motorcycle and the truck bumper, and I had a scrape or seven in various places. I looked at myself in the bathroom - nothing was broken or bleeding (or if bleeding only a little) and since I was closer to Hatboro, I decided to continue the trip there and hole up in a motel until the next day to see if rest made the pain go away.
The pain did not go away the next day and my left leg had assumed the color of an eggplant, so I decided to make one visit and then head for home instead of staying until Sunday or Monday and wandering around bucks and Montgomery county as I had planned. Riding didn't hurt, but getting off when I got home surely did, and when my lovely wife saw my leg she was not pleased. Eventually I had it seen, nothing was broken, and slowly it healed and assumed its normal coloring. Then I got some sort of respiratory thing, had a chest X-ray and was told to get a CT scan, because the X-ray showed something like maybe an aneurysm.... the day I had the scan, my mother died. Two weeks later, I was hospitalized for a GI bleed that took about 5 bags of blood before it stopped. Endoscopy showed ulcers - but I never knew they were there - no pain, no real discomfort (at least until I had lost so much blood I was falling down trying to walk to my chair) nothing like any warning. The doctors said that I must be under a lost of stress. Years later, reflecting on the happenings of that few weeks, I guess they were right, but at the time I didn't think so.
Then about 6 weeks ago, I dropped the motorcycle on my right leg (usually it is the left that I fall on....) and was in the presence of friends and fellow riders, so getting up was not hard. We had stopped for ice cream, and as I made my way to get some, I noticed that that foot really hurt - but I got my ice cream and rode home accompanied by some friends who would not let me ride alone. I didn't think it was all that bad, it just hurt. A couple of days later I had it X-rayed and found a nondisplaced fracture of the fibula. After 71 years, I broke a bone. I went to see an orthopod, was told I had to stay home and wear a fracture boot. Meanwhile I had a couple of important projects at work, so I arranged to work at home, and within a week I woke up with some pretty awful abdominal pain, ended up in the ER, and had emergency surgery to find the source of the free air in my abdomen, which turned out to be a little bitty ulcer that had perforated, right next to two big ones that had not. The surgeon was a bariatric surgeon, so he was able to do what needed done laporoscopically, which meant a far shorter recovery time than might have been possible. Still, although the surgery was less than the bypass, from which I was sent home with 47 hours of my arrival in the hospital, this one took four days before I was sent home, and I was a whole lot more beat-up feeling. I was older, and less prepared, and it took its toll. Upon reflection, I guess falling, having a broken leg, a new boss and some hot projects was more stress than I was used to, it aggravated the ulcers I didn't know I had, and ended up blowing through the wall of my duodenum.
I am told that the bleed a few years back or this perforation could have ended my life, and that had I not gone directly to the hospital, the damage from the perforation could have kept me there for weeks instead of just a few days. Hard as it may be to believe, until now the phrase 'might have ended my life' has not registered - I thought it was just inconvenient that these things were happening.
If I seem to be a bit low key, you'll know why.
It's been a while - and aging is not for the timid.
I haven't had much to say for quite a while, and have a backlog of rants that will sooner or later show up here. Meanwhile, I am discovering that aging sucks if it is happening to you (or, in my case, to me!)
I will be 72 in February. I still go to work each day (except for the last month or so, about which more later) and for the most part i enjoy it. I like what I do, I like having the income, and the thought of retirement, with the attendant loss in income scares hell out of me. I like the income, I like having a bit left over for toys and pleasures, and it is not going to be easy readjusting my lifestyle to run on less than have of what we're used to, particularly when expenses are increasing. I don't want to give up some of my toys.
The last month has been pretty rough. A combination of things has caused me to be unable to drive or go to work, so I have been working at home, and damn glad that my employer has put up with it. I rather like it, but really need to get back to regular attendance - hopefully it will start happening next week.
The causes of this little misadventure are several, but all go back to a decision I made in 1964, and got to exercise in 1965. That decision was that I was tired of being a fat guy, that it was a problem that I could not manage by myself and that a gastric bypass would help me lose the weight.
The long and short of it is that I was right, somewhat, and wrong, somewhat - and it has taken until the past few weeks to let me know exactly how much of any assumptions I might have made were truly asinine.
This is going to take a couple of posts, just to separate the main events and put them in proper historical perspective, so I think I'll call them something like 'How I Got This Way' parts 1 through whatever it takes.
I can't do it all tonight, because it is late, I am tired, and after a while of late and tired I get stupid - and I want this to be right, or at least accurate. It has taken me several years to understand just how life-threatening a couple of things that have happened have been; suffice it to say that I could have been (and perhaps should have been) gone several years ago, and it is only a combination of fortune, a stubborn wife and daughter, and some superb medical care that permits me to write this and the following pieces. I am starting to appreciate this - up until now I was getting really good at denying it.
More to come - I'm headed for bed!
I will be 72 in February. I still go to work each day (except for the last month or so, about which more later) and for the most part i enjoy it. I like what I do, I like having the income, and the thought of retirement, with the attendant loss in income scares hell out of me. I like the income, I like having a bit left over for toys and pleasures, and it is not going to be easy readjusting my lifestyle to run on less than have of what we're used to, particularly when expenses are increasing. I don't want to give up some of my toys.
The last month has been pretty rough. A combination of things has caused me to be unable to drive or go to work, so I have been working at home, and damn glad that my employer has put up with it. I rather like it, but really need to get back to regular attendance - hopefully it will start happening next week.
The causes of this little misadventure are several, but all go back to a decision I made in 1964, and got to exercise in 1965. That decision was that I was tired of being a fat guy, that it was a problem that I could not manage by myself and that a gastric bypass would help me lose the weight.
The long and short of it is that I was right, somewhat, and wrong, somewhat - and it has taken until the past few weeks to let me know exactly how much of any assumptions I might have made were truly asinine.
This is going to take a couple of posts, just to separate the main events and put them in proper historical perspective, so I think I'll call them something like 'How I Got This Way' parts 1 through whatever it takes.
I can't do it all tonight, because it is late, I am tired, and after a while of late and tired I get stupid - and I want this to be right, or at least accurate. It has taken me several years to understand just how life-threatening a couple of things that have happened have been; suffice it to say that I could have been (and perhaps should have been) gone several years ago, and it is only a combination of fortune, a stubborn wife and daughter, and some superb medical care that permits me to write this and the following pieces. I am starting to appreciate this - up until now I was getting really good at denying it.
More to come - I'm headed for bed!
Friday, August 3, 2012
"Gay Marriage"
This one will draw rocks, so let me preface it with a few notes.
- I have nothing against homosexual people of either sex - as long as they do not try to convince me that their way is right and mine is wrong.
- I have transgendered friends. We don't talk about why or how - we just talk.
- I abhor the misuse of the word "gay". I think that right now it has too many uses, rendering it meaningless. I used to be sure I knew what it meant - now I have to think - a lot before reacting to it.
All that having been said, the issue of homosexual "marriage" is my hot button today. With the foregoing in mind, I object to using words to mean too many things - because they end up meaning nothing.
I know what marriage is to me, my wife and our children. I know that homosexual behavior is a biological dead end - they cannot reproduce wit assistance of those that they abjure - the "breeders" otherwise known as heterosexual (or, by some, Normal.)
I believe that parents matter - that is to say, parents as my generation understands them, one of each. Sometimes we are not perfect; sometimes we are not even good - life is a huge crapshoot, and we don't always get what we want. I don't believe that two mommies or two daddies can prepare a child for a world that largely consists of mommies and daddies and their kids - and I believe that suggestible kids are easy to convince that two mommies or two daddies is the normal circumstance and the kids will grow up inclined to homosexuality as a learned behavior. I've seen it - I don't believe that it happens every time, but I know it does happen that way.
With the best of wills I can find no body of research suggesting that homosexuality has a genetic component. I do know that there is a body of research suggesting that family environment can help push a confused child in that direction. That having been said, I recognize that there are many people who are homosexual who are also very valuable, functional people from whom everyone could learn much - and they are not mostly artists, musicians, etc, but are found in all professions, trades, walks of life, faiths - everywhere people are found. But, unlike the rest of us, they cannot make new people without outside help.
And therein lies the rub - they seek 'equality' and to some of them, equality means marriage, please do not ask me why.
And therein lies the rub - they seek 'equality' and to some of them, equality means marriage, please do not ask me why.
I am told that love and commitment are found in heterosexual couples and in homosexual couples, which I can understand. But there is more to marriage than that - and I do not mean the bearing and raising of children - there are heterosexual couple who cannot make children or will not make children - but that's not the same as not being equipped with the matching parts.
When I suggest a civil union statute (which is all a state-supplied marriage license gives anybody anyhow, for all of its being called a marriage license.) I am told that equal but separate isn't equal, what they want is sameness. The only way it can be the same is if it is completely the same; partly the same is not identical, but different. For a same-sex couple, the only way to make it really the same is for one to become a transgender person - then there will be matching parts (if artificially constructed.) Somehow I do not think that this will be well received, and anyhow among the transgendered folks I know (admittedly not many) the males who had married and had children and subsequently became 'female', they still want women for companions. Does that mean that even though they have had a physical change that they are still male, or that in the process they have become homosexual? I don't know, and really do not want to ask - I'm pretty old and don't dodge so well any more.
When I suggest a civil union statute (which is all a state-supplied marriage license gives anybody anyhow, for all of its being called a marriage license.) I am told that equal but separate isn't equal, what they want is sameness. The only way it can be the same is if it is completely the same; partly the same is not identical, but different. For a same-sex couple, the only way to make it really the same is for one to become a transgender person - then there will be matching parts (if artificially constructed.) Somehow I do not think that this will be well received, and anyhow among the transgendered folks I know (admittedly not many) the males who had married and had children and subsequently became 'female', they still want women for companions. Does that mean that even though they have had a physical change that they are still male, or that in the process they have become homosexual? I don't know, and really do not want to ask - I'm pretty old and don't dodge so well any more.
Perhaps I could get over the issue of calling it 'marriage' - but I can't get past 'it's not the same' - because it is not the same, and nothing will make it the same.
I am tired of being diminished, called names, and generally abused by the militant homosexuals because I will not agree to the idea of 'sameness' - because 'same' is another one of those words I see becoming meaningless - 'the same only different.'
I am tired of being diminished, called names, and generally abused by the militant homosexuals because I will not agree to the idea of 'sameness' - because 'same' is another one of those words I see becoming meaningless - 'the same only different.'
That's what I think. Notice I didn't say 'feel' - apparently the world nowadays is composed more of folks who 'feel' than folks who'think' - and in my opinion it is a great loss for the world. Self-esteem has replaced self-respect - and the deterioration in many areas shows the consequences.
I'll discuss the current occupant in another rant.
Monday, December 7, 2009
Merry Christmas
I know, I am early - but I heard about something this morning.
I have heard of folks giving kidneys to other folks. Today I learned that I know someone involved in such a case. Without being too specific, a husband happens to be a match for his wife's brother - tested as a last resort when there were no matches - for whatever reason there's a match.
Surgery should occur before Christmas is actually here.
This is giving of oneself in its purest and most personal form - what Christmas should be all about.
Quite literally, it is the gift of life.
I have heard of folks giving kidneys to other folks. Today I learned that I know someone involved in such a case. Without being too specific, a husband happens to be a match for his wife's brother - tested as a last resort when there were no matches - for whatever reason there's a match.
Surgery should occur before Christmas is actually here.
This is giving of oneself in its purest and most personal form - what Christmas should be all about.
Quite literally, it is the gift of life.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Thanksgiving
I know, it's been over for almost a week - but today is the first time there has been time to think about it all that hard.
I've been alive almost 68 years - and I guess, considering the number of dead people I know that I should be most thankful for that, and I am. I'm grateful that I can still work and that there are folks that value what I can do.
I've been married for almost 42 of those years, and can still remember the good old single days, and have to concede that they weren't all that great. My wife is a very patient lady, and puts up with a lot, but she's still here, and together we have three good kids, some grandkids and will have another before too long. I can still be musical under the direction of my wife, and enjoy the experience.
I'm still riding my motorcycle, and proved this past Sunday that I can still pick it up if I need to, not that I wanted to know that....
I'm grateful for our families - for our parents who are long gone, for values they instilled in us, for experiences involved in growing up in a small town, for siblings and cousins aplenty, for summers in the Pittsburgh area with cousins and friends, and for shared experiences with neighborhood friends.
I'm grateful for all the ladies that have entered and left my life over the years, even though sometimes things ended badly - each taught me something of value, and I cherish the memories of all of them. I'm particularly grateful to my wife - she has put up with a lot over the years, and has been supportive through good times, bad times and truly horrid times. I am not a perfect person, and she has grown pretty good at overlooking that fact.
I am grateful for having served in the Air Force. My enlistment may have been triggered by a fear of the draft, but the experiences, education, and travel that that four years brought were a large piece of my education and maturing process. I enjoyed what I did in the service and would go again in a heartbeat. I appreciate our troops, support them, and get a wee bit irritable when I hear them denigrated - those who speak ill of the Service as a career and of those who choose to make it a career are fools at best. I recommend to everyone exiting high school that consideration be given to a term of service. I went in at 19, was single and rather aimless, and it gave me experience and purpose - and taught me at least 200 things I never in my life wanted to do again!
My gratitude for family influence gets greater with each year - and as I grow older I am amazed at just how much my father and grandfather knew that mattered - and how much many better educated people knew that didn't matter. My brothers and I each went our own way and survived the experience, learning all the way, and we are still civil to one another. I wish one brother was on the east coast instead of where he is - as we grow older we find it harder to get together on any regular basis, although when we do it seems that conversation picks up where it left off, and the time between meetings disappears.
My father and his brother were two very different people - and I am grateful for having been able to get to know both, even though Uncle Bob was in California, and we were not. I have traveled for work some of the places I have been employed, and family that wandered to California have always welcomed me when I was able to get to their area. Uncle Bob was the person who introduced me to Disneyland, a time I'll never forget, when I had first returned from a prolonged stay in Germany.
The time in Germany was something I'll not soon forget - learning the land, the people, the language, and exploring on my motorcycle. There are people I met there who are still with me, even though I've not seen them since 1966; learning experiences that could not be repeated anywhere else, and lessons about people and places that I carry with me.
All in all, it has been interesting so far, and my gratitude goes out to people without number who have helped me, counseled me, commiserated with me, taught me things, introduced me to exotic foods, different languages, and other ways to look at the bits that make life interesting, and to my various family members, without whom it would have been really dull!
Thanks, all of you - you have helped shape what I am today - take credit for the best parts, and blame the worst parts on my humanity.
Happy Tuesday, everyone!
I've been alive almost 68 years - and I guess, considering the number of dead people I know that I should be most thankful for that, and I am. I'm grateful that I can still work and that there are folks that value what I can do.
I've been married for almost 42 of those years, and can still remember the good old single days, and have to concede that they weren't all that great. My wife is a very patient lady, and puts up with a lot, but she's still here, and together we have three good kids, some grandkids and will have another before too long. I can still be musical under the direction of my wife, and enjoy the experience.
I'm still riding my motorcycle, and proved this past Sunday that I can still pick it up if I need to, not that I wanted to know that....
I'm grateful for our families - for our parents who are long gone, for values they instilled in us, for experiences involved in growing up in a small town, for siblings and cousins aplenty, for summers in the Pittsburgh area with cousins and friends, and for shared experiences with neighborhood friends.
I'm grateful for all the ladies that have entered and left my life over the years, even though sometimes things ended badly - each taught me something of value, and I cherish the memories of all of them. I'm particularly grateful to my wife - she has put up with a lot over the years, and has been supportive through good times, bad times and truly horrid times. I am not a perfect person, and she has grown pretty good at overlooking that fact.
I am grateful for having served in the Air Force. My enlistment may have been triggered by a fear of the draft, but the experiences, education, and travel that that four years brought were a large piece of my education and maturing process. I enjoyed what I did in the service and would go again in a heartbeat. I appreciate our troops, support them, and get a wee bit irritable when I hear them denigrated - those who speak ill of the Service as a career and of those who choose to make it a career are fools at best. I recommend to everyone exiting high school that consideration be given to a term of service. I went in at 19, was single and rather aimless, and it gave me experience and purpose - and taught me at least 200 things I never in my life wanted to do again!
My gratitude for family influence gets greater with each year - and as I grow older I am amazed at just how much my father and grandfather knew that mattered - and how much many better educated people knew that didn't matter. My brothers and I each went our own way and survived the experience, learning all the way, and we are still civil to one another. I wish one brother was on the east coast instead of where he is - as we grow older we find it harder to get together on any regular basis, although when we do it seems that conversation picks up where it left off, and the time between meetings disappears.
My father and his brother were two very different people - and I am grateful for having been able to get to know both, even though Uncle Bob was in California, and we were not. I have traveled for work some of the places I have been employed, and family that wandered to California have always welcomed me when I was able to get to their area. Uncle Bob was the person who introduced me to Disneyland, a time I'll never forget, when I had first returned from a prolonged stay in Germany.
The time in Germany was something I'll not soon forget - learning the land, the people, the language, and exploring on my motorcycle. There are people I met there who are still with me, even though I've not seen them since 1966; learning experiences that could not be repeated anywhere else, and lessons about people and places that I carry with me.
All in all, it has been interesting so far, and my gratitude goes out to people without number who have helped me, counseled me, commiserated with me, taught me things, introduced me to exotic foods, different languages, and other ways to look at the bits that make life interesting, and to my various family members, without whom it would have been really dull!
Thanks, all of you - you have helped shape what I am today - take credit for the best parts, and blame the worst parts on my humanity.
Happy Tuesday, everyone!
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Back to work
I was off from the day before Christmas through Monday. By off, I mean not obligated to go to work - some folks will tell you I'm off all the time, but they're just being unkind. At least that's what I think. Anyhow, I made it in Monday, and forgot that the boss was still off, so there wasn't much on Monday to elevate my blood pressure, and it wasn't a bad day as days go except, of course, for the weather that was so bad it could not even be said to suck.
I finally had a good day last week, and got the motorcycle out to get the last little bit of fixing done. At least that's what I told myself - the truth is I really wanted a reason to ride, and I really did enjoy getting out to ride. After I got back in the evening I dropped an email on one of my riding pals, and was more than a but chagrined to learn that he had spent part of his holidays having a pacemaker/defibrillator implanted in his chest. He's at least 6 years younger than I am, and has already had cardiac surgery many years back. Getting old sucks. But by the spring I'll bet he's ready to ride again. Meanwhile, maybe I can talk him into an afternoon of music making....
I need to get some more weight off - at least another 100 pounds, although another 20 would take care of the 18 I have gained back and then some, and make me feel good. I'm really pretty grumpy right now, and people at work are starting to avoid me. I'm antisocial enough that this is good to a point, but when folks tremble and walk sideways against a wall to get past me I begin to wonder if I'm not just a little bit more incendiary than I need to be.
Maybe I just need to spend a day with my daughter and let her baby drool all over me and giggle at me a while. That'd be cheaper than a weekend away at a gambling resort or somewhere like that. Of course I could always take a train to Chicago for a day - the overnight trip there is really great, a day wandering wouldn't be bad, and the overnight train back is wonderful - and nobody would do anything to disturb me at all during the whole trip. Now all I need is a business reason for it....
I've been finding classmates and other friends on FaceBook. Everyone should get a FaceBook page! Some of what's there, like what's on YouTube, is reprehensible - but some of it is pretty good, and even the ads can be useful. I probably spend more time at this than I should, but sooner or later it'll get old and then I'll be more productive until the next thing comes along.
I found a ShoutCast station that plays nothing but The Blues Brothers. They did some stuff I never heard and it's pretty good. There are a couple that specialize in solo piano, and it really is nice. I have to introduce my wife to this - maybe for some good music she'll touch a computer - particularly if I buy one for her, maybe....
I think I've had all the fun I should have on any one day, and it is pushing 6 PM pretty hard, so I will clean up here (or at least hide most of the crap in desk drawers) and head for home. Y'all be good, y'hear?
Monday, December 8, 2008
Patriot MicroChip
THE PATRIOT MICRO CHIP is intended to be implanted in terrorists.
The implant is specifically designed to be installed in the forehead.
The implant is specifically designed to be installed in the forehead.
When properly installed it will allow the implantee to speak to God.
It comes in various sizes.
The exact size of the implant will be selected by a well-trained and highly-skilled technician. The implant may or may not be painless. Side effects, like headaches and nausea are temporary. Some bleeding or swelling may occur at the injection site.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Sunday Afternoon
I thought I would get to dog it today , but it is not to be - choir this morning went well, but I forgot about an organ committee meeting this afternoon, which will keep me from computer stuff I need to do on the church's network. Maybe next weekend.
I saw several motorcyclists today, and can only conclude that they have better circulation than I do, that they're dead, or that they don't feel the cold like us older folks do. I thought about starting one motorcycle this morning and then changed my mind and took the old Volvo to church. Probably one of my more clever moves this weekend - I sure didn't have any on Saturday....
Phyllis and I had lunch at a place we like for the first time in many weeks, and it was nice to have an hour undisturbed and uninterrupted by some reality of life. We don't have enough of these times any more - one of the things I am suposed to work on is somehow finding or creating more of them. For some reason I thought that when I reached this age there would be leisure aplently, and that it would not be hard to schedule relaxed time since that's all there would be. I sure did get that one wrong.
Out baby Elizabeth sang in early church and I didn't get there, but Phyllis assures me that she did beautifully. Liz's baby Sam was bellyaching when I arrived but stopped within a couple of minutes (no thanks to me) and I was reminded how not ready I am for my baby to be a Mom. I guess maybe I never will be completely ready for her to be a totally independant person, but she's doing it so well, and has scheduled her life much better than I had at her age. She was 26 today, has her master's degree, a couple years of teaching experience, a husband and a baby - and they're all well, healthy and happy. I wish I could take some credit for all of this but I can't - she's her own person, and that person has grown into a really great adult, seemingly while I wasn't looking. How does this happen?
Well, I have to go get some coffee and get back to church for the organ committee meeting, after which I just might get to work on the network for a little bit - if I can remember to take this ToughBook with me. One thing I am learning is to have Vista, which is what was on the last two computers we bohght for church. Granted, it does a lot that I used to have to do for myself, but I am not convinced that it does it better, and I know damn well that it takes away many options, not to mention sucking down resources like they were infinite.
Of course, I am still convinced that OS/2 should have won over WinDoze 3.1....
Be well, y'all - I gotta go.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)